are you so shy because you have an std?
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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