if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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