Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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