Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
