I never want to see another naked old woman again.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
