end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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