jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
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