Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize