im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
