Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
