Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
