If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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