The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
