need another drink. this is the easiest way
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize