I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
