I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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