Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
My liver just broke up with me...
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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