well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
