Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
