38 yer olds are good kisserssss
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
