remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
