So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
