i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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