I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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