Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
