Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
