I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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