There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
