Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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