last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
