I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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