Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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