Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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