My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Another day, another engagement, another cat
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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