Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Randomize