he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
