Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize