Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
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