i just wanna soil my oats bro
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
