So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
