I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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