Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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