Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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