THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Randomize
