we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
