GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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