I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Randomize
