i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
