I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
