I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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