I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
two words...techno handjob
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
