Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
