We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
