i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
i dont even know how to be here
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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